I’m Just Sayin’ 3

March 9, 2009 at 2:06 pm | Posted in Biblical Eyesight, I'm Just Sayin' | 11 Comments
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I know there are some people who are genuinely concerned about other people’s physical appearances, but, I’m just sayin’, I already know how I look.

Believe me, I DO have a mirror in my house. It’s not my favorite thing at which to look, but I make a point to look into it at least once a day. And, although it might be hard for some people to accept, I DO know the condition of my own eyes.

Here’s me and here’s a dude that weighs 450 pounds. We are talking pleasantly to each other, but otherwise minding our own business. Here comes a third person walking up to us. This third person looks at the obese man and says… NOTHING. This third person looks at me, and says, “Hey man, what’s wrong with your eyes? You have really dark circles. And they’re RED! You look rough, like you didn’t get much sleep last night.”

Now, all of these things are true, but I’m just sayin’, what is it about tired-looking eyes that calls for a complete scorched-earth campaign of honesty against all social etiquette? This happens to me multiple times each day – I’m neither kidding nor exaggerating.

Here’s the skinny: I was BORN with dark circles under my eyes. My eyes are puffy and swollen if I’ve been up all night, and they are puffy and swollen if I slept 16 hours a night for the last three nights in a row. My eyes have ALWAYS been red and bloodshot – I can show you my elementary school pictures. And, finally, YES, I DO KNOW IT!

To top it off, people have very selective memories. Many of the people I know – and HAVE KNOWN for 10+ years – tell me how my eyes look EVERY TIME they see me – often more than once during the same day!

I’ve seen these same people interact with amputees. I’ve seen them interact with horrendously-obvious toupee’-wearers – and nary a word. But let me show up – and, all of sudden, the gloves are off. “Wow, your eyes… Did you know you have really big bags under your eyes?”

Maybe people are just extremely sympathetic and helpful, but, if you see someone with something about his face that you obviously find noteworthy of mention or amazement, here’s a hint: You are NOT REQUIRED to mention it every time you see him! I’m just sayin’.

meerkat eyes

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11 Comments »

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  1. I think your eyes are sexy… 🙂

    La

  2. Well…

    You made me laugh! Not AT you. Well, I suppose not with you, either. You’re not laughing, are you?

    It’s an intersting point. I’m wondering, are those pointing this out namely women? Cause I can tell you that a very good friend of mine has a terrible time with bags under the eyes and I truly believe she has made it her life’s mission (well, one of them) to conquer this problem.

    And here’s the thing. I don’t notice them nearly as much as she points them out. But she has the benefit of makeup. I don’t suppose you’ll be resorting to that? Women put way too much emphasis on the endless tiny (okay, sometimes large) details that make up who we are.

    Sad.

    When I was in my late teens I worked with a good friend that kept me in stitches. One day I turned around after taking an order (yep, fast food) and she was holding paper bags under her eyes.

    After a heavy sigh she said, “I have large bags under my eyes.” Cracked me slap up. Guess it might not be quite as funny sitting in your office. I’d laugh, though.

  3. Hey, found you from your wife’s blog! And I’m glad to know I’m not the only one with dark circles, haha!

  4. Rena said: “I’m wondering, are those pointing this out namely women?”

    No, Rena, I’m an equal-opportunity insult-recipient. Men and women, boys and girls of all ages, are eager to be the first to clue me in on what they must assume I’ve lived my whole life without noticing.

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